last night i had an amazing insight into my attitudes and reactions to the business world. all along i had been under the assumption that things should be fair. if i was twice as valuable as a co-worker, i should be compensated twice as much, not the reverse. working hard and being a valuable, skilled, employee should result in recognition and rewards from the company. it's only fair, right? most women would probably be nodding their heads and agreeing to that, but most men would be shaking their heads and wondering where i got these fantastic notions.

business is a game. it's a game in which men (usually) understand the rules. while women are left wondering why they never get treated right. while i'm furiously trying to figure out why i'm not being compensated better than a useless co-worker, the people playing the game are admiring how well that person played it by negotiating a high compensation package while being mostly useless. the thought of comparing the two packages based on value never even crosses their minds.

the first principle i learned last night was that fairness doesn't exist, it's all about how you play the game and maneuver to get what you want. it'll never get handed to you on merit alone.

the second principle is that attacks are never personal, they're power plays that will be forgotten as soon as a meeting is over. while i was getting personally offended earlier this week that someone would blatantly say my ui sucked in the middle of a meeting, he was just making a play for power. the method (undermining someone's skills) was admittedly underhanded, but it's definitely an effective method.

i feel like i've woken up to a whole new world where suddenly actions make sense. the whole corporate structure works on a model that i'd never understood. i'd seen glimpses, but it had never consolidated into this holistic view of a game constantly being played. a game in which the only goal is winning.

every woman should read the book hardball for women. it will definitely change your view of the world.

copyright 1997-2000, by brig.